Maine (sigh)

Peeping time 

The way my friend Watson and I say Maine to each other borders on reverence, almost like speaking in a hushed tone about something sacred. We sigh it out, and just thinking of Maine makes our blood pressure drop.

We had never been in Maine at the same time until a recent October weekend when Watson’s son Paul and his bride Maricka got married at Sebago Lake. 

The venue was Migis Lodge which I pronounced “Midgies” assuming it was a friendly diminutive like Mimi’s. Boy was I wrong. It is pronounced MY-GIS. The guy at the front desk told me it is a Native American word for beautiful place to rest. I doubt that, but it makes a nice selling point for the lodge.

Sebago Lake

Migis Lodge, a popular family resort needs no selling points. Some families rent a cabin at Migi Lodge for the same two weeks every summer generation after generation.  When you arrive you are awed by Sebago Lake, as clear as a Windexed window, surrounded by trees aflame with the colors of oranges, clementines, lemons, pomegranates, and lobster bisque.

Migis Lodge Lobby

Inside the lodge, the dictionary definition of cozy. Leather couches, fireplaces, books. Our room was a grand affair with a four-poster bed, a fireplace, easy chairs, a balcony overlooking the lake, high vaulted ceilings with what looked like brand new cedar wood. But how could that be? Migis was built in 1916.

And the nicest touch, one I have never seen in the hundreds of hotels I’ve stayed in, a Levenger’s lap desk for writing. Intended for use by the fireside, or in bed, or on the balcony, or wherever you happen to find your lap. 

Migis Lodge

Migis Lodge is on 125 acres of Maine forest along 3500 feet of lake shoreline with plenty of athletic activities and short hiking trails. 

Okay I admit, I head for the ocean every time I go to Maine. I have eschewed lakes and forests. How narrow minded of me. Maine has 6000 lakes and ponds, and 90 percent of the state is forested, something  I've ignored, instead hugging the coastline, which is so very huggable.  Migis Lodge made see what I’ve been missing. 

The wedding party

The wedding weekend was beautiful and fun, the food was delicious, the guests were a mix of astoundingly fit grandparents, people who never have never to Maine, and well-dressed gen Xers from Boston where the bride and groom live. Paul has a successful career, Maricka is a soon-to-be medical doctor and the world is their Pemaquid oyster. 

 How nice to experience three days of pure joy, hope, and optimism. 

Higgins Beach

We flew into in Portland a day early, and had a Japanese lunch at Miyake with my delightful 86-year-old cousin Zandy who regularly dances the tango. We stayed overnight at the Higgins Beach Inn with a wonderful restaurant called Shade. Higgins Beach is far different from my childhood home, Old Orchard Beach; it is devoid of carnival rides, skeeball, and French Canadians in Speedos. 

Higgins Beach

We made the mandatory stop at the flagship LL Bean in Freeport. When we asked the greeter where to have lunch she said "Go to The Tuscan Brick Oven. It’s decent.” She was right, nothing more and nothing less. It is not a good time to go to LL Bean. A new building is under construction, and the interim location, which looked like a tent, reminded me of shopping at Nordstrom Rack. 

Maine Veterans Memorial Cemetery

We drove to Maine Veterans Memorial Cemetery in Augusta to visit the grave of my birthmother, whom I did not know existed until I was 38. I sat by her marker on a warm sunny fall day, brushed the leaves off her head stone, left some flowers, and thanked her for the gift of life. 

You can read a bit more on that story here.

Things to Know Before You Go to Japan

Children on the subway

Don't be surprised if you see small children navigating the subways and trains by themselves. We found it discouraging that 6-year-olds could find their way around the Japanese transit system better than we did. 

Nara Park, 1240 acres and not a trash can in sight

There is no place to throw anything away. Ironically, this is how Japan stays so clean, by eliminating trash receptacles. If you get a bottle of water or soda, plan to carry the empty with you for hours. Or if you get a matcha ice cream cone, plan on being stuck with sticky green paper and sticky hands the rest of the day. Pack it in, pack it out, leave no trace, the whole country is using the national parks system.

Enjoy a bidet a day, every day. Toto’s Washlet Toilet does it all, deodorizes, makes bird chirping sounds, warms the seat, and even raises the toilet seat when you approach. As if it sees you! Bidets abound—in five-star hotels, department stores, subway stations, and convenience markets. 

Room service

Automation rules. When I called the front desk to ask for extra coffee pods at my hotel, they sent me a robot! A large metallic rectangle on wheels somehow managed to find my room, ring the doorbell and display a touch screen that said “Open.” There was my coffee. 

My companion at a Japanese waffle restaurant

You’ll also be ordering your own food in many restaurants. Why bother the staff when a barcode will do the job! A tour guide explained that every sector of the Japanese economy is suffering from a reduced job force, because of an aging population. Baby Boomers to blame again. 

Inexplicable whimsy

Pack your own paper products. Japan is thin on paper, except for toilet paper. Despite the fact that you get a warm cloth at every restaurant, paper napkins are skimpy and in short supply, and tissues are undersized. 

Even the fruit is well dressed

Plan to be killed with kindness. All transactions and interactions include a slight bow and an outpouring of politesse, well-wishing, and appreciation. In the waiting area at an airport, ANA flight attendants bowed to customers upon arrival. And the ground crew waved bye-bye to the passengers on board. When you think about it, being killed with kindness is not a bad way to go. 

Kind characters Pikachu and Totoro

The Cousin Carousel

Yay! New England in August

On a one-week jaunt through New England, I saw a total of 33 cousins, including spouses and children, in three states, and four different settings. 

There was a Clark family reunion in New Hampshire; a Cohn family reunion in Vermont and Boston; and a first time meeting with “new cousins,” in Hull, Mass. I am so glad that this collective of cousins resides in New England, a perfect excuse for swampy, soupy Washington DC. 

We woke up to the news that our flight to Manchester, NH was cancelled. Fortunately, an hour later we got a flight to Boston. Close enough. We took an Uber from Boston to Manchester, the normal drive of an hour plus took twice as long because of a van fire, and a preponderance of Friday traffic. As we approached Manchester we heard a radio commercial advertising a “colossal lobster roll.” Our ears perked up, or is it pricked up?  The 99 restaurant was only 7 minutes away. You can guess what happened next. 

New Hampshire 

Family reunion, New Boston

New Hampshire is a sweet little bite-sized state in the heart of New England. Once you get accustomed to the jarring “Live Free or Die” license plates, you can enjoy all that the state has to offer. Mountains, beaches, streams, lakes, lush greenery, gardens, and farmland. 

New Boston, happy hour under the oak

The reunion was held at a house on 200 acres of unfarmed farmland in New Boston. The enormous family home (constructed in the 1700’s, expanded in the 1930’s) was purchased by my great aunt Lois Warren and her husband Winfield Shaw in 1916, and has remained in the family. I asked what time we should be there on Friday night and my cousin replied by text that dinner would be at 6:30 p.m. or 7:00, but first they were all going to Happy Hour at The Oak. I thought The Oak was a bar. But it’s the enormous oak tree in the front yard that Cousin Rhoda (who lived to age 99) planted when she was 16. There were 20 people at the reunion ranging in age from 91 to 18 months. 

Touring the house with Elizabeth

The cousins took us on a tour of the house with detailed descriptions of the architecture, art work, and furniture. It turns out that these cousins are just as interested as I am in preserving and archiving family photos, letters, and other memorabilia. As one cousin said, “You’d think we were related or something.” 

Reviewing the photos with Heather, Elizabeth, and Arden

The next day we had brunch at our hotel The Grand at Bedford Village with second cousins I was meeting for the first time, Alison and her husband Hank who live in Portsmouth. Alison is also very interested in the family history and is applying for entry to the Mayflower Society, based on our lineage. 

Alison and Hank

Vermont 

Touring the grounds

I have long eschewed this nice little green state because it lacks what I consider the best part of New England, the ocean. But it has what my cousins consider the best part of New England—mountains and  skiing. And it’s just beautiful in the summer. My cousins Bill and Sue moved to Northfield, Vermont from Boston about a year ago. They have an enormous property, a four-story house, a wrap-around porch, an art studio, a garage, a greenhouse, an orchard, a pond, and vegetable gardens. 

Bill, Charlotte and Sue

Max, Ben, and Bill

As Sue said, “we didn’t do a very good job of downsizing,” the usual path for retirees, but they love it. Their favorite ski area is only half an hour away.  Sue and Bill are both artists and her artwork fills the house, while his ceramic sculptures dot the property. Daughter Charlotte was there visiting from New York City, and they invited the rest of the next-gen younger cousins to dinner: Ben and Max and his bride Britt, who have also moved to Vermont. 

The next day we went to Bartlett Falls, a waterfall that cascades into a large natural pool of fresh water. When I was looking through the crystal-clear water, and up at the boulders that shaped this perfect swimming hole, I described it as a “Vermont concentrate” experience.

Bristol, Main Street

 

We had lunch at Snaps in Bristol, a classic small town that looks like a movie set.

We stopped at Canteen Creemee, where I had a "maple creemee,” a soft serve ice cream unique to Vermont. It was one of the most delicious things I have ever eaten. 

That night we ate at a Thai restaurant in Randolph called Saap. It was delicious, but we were somewhat distracted by the fact that a man at another table fell to the floor after his chair broke. He was a 20-something, so he bounced up like a rubber ball. 

Bartlett Falls

Massachusetts 

Eric and Julia

On the road from Vermont to Massachusetts, we had the “best meal at a rest stop,” at the Common Man Roadside Market and Deli in Hooksett NH, (93 South). Not only did I have the grilled cheese sandwich on sourdough toast of my dreams, but the accompanying fries were outstanding. I’m somewhat of a French fry connoisseur, if those words can go together, and these were perfect-- hot, well-salted, and crunchy. 

Young Julia

We made a special trip to Newton to have dinner with my cousin Julia and her fiancé Eric at Mida. We were there to celebrate Julia’s birthday, but just a day before they had announced their engagement. So it was a double-double celebration. 

JFK Memorial Library

We had time to kill before our fourth and final cousin encounter, so we went to the fabulous John F Kennedy Memorial Library, which was designed by IM Pei, a magnificent glass building with a view of the water from every direction. 

Next we drove to The Parrot, in Hull, Massachusetts to meet some first cousins for the first time. It’s a long story, but in brief, after both of my parents died, I discovered that my mother, Lynn Warren, was not my birthmother. My father once had a liaison with Peggy Foley from Portland, Maine. And I was the result.  

Two years ago I met Peggy’s niece Kathy, whom I’ve dubbed Saint Kathleen because she was the first person who could tell me about Peggy.  This trip to Hull was to meet Kathy’s brothers (Peggy’s nephews, James and Michael). When I told them about all of the cousin visits over the past week  said “They’re all second cousins I don’t have any first cousins.” 

James corrected me and said, “Well you do now!” They welcomed me like a family member, pointed out some resemblances, and were a delight.

James, Mike, Kathy 

JFK Memorial Library

Oh Canada!/Berkeley Bounce-Back

 

View from the condo

Vancouver

I have trouble thinking of Canada as an international destination. Aren’t they just our neighbors to the North? Can’t we just run up there without much fuss? The place I summered as a child, Old Orchard Beach, Maine, was full of Canadians. I'm pretty sure they just hopped in their cars and drove down from Montreal. Now we are stopped at the border, coming and going.

My friend Jane and I were in Vancouver for our first time, so we had a lot of ground to cover in three days. Our Airbnb condo was on the twenty-second floor and we had sweeping views of the city. And we were near the Gastown neighborhood where people go to have a gas, or get some weed, it is dotted with cannabis stores. And there’s a famous steam clock that burped out some gas, lights and calliope music every thirty minutes. People stop to listen, watch, and photograph it, but we just saw it as a lot of hot air. 

Cherry pyramids at Granville Public Market

Provence in Coleur on Granville Island

Our first morning we fell for that old tourist trope, the Hop on Hop Off Big Bus. We wanted to catch it “midstream” instead of at the origination point, and we walked aimlessly for an hour trying to find the pick-up stps. We finally took a cab to Canada Place, the Big Bus Headquarters. The bus stops at several Vancouver highlights, the Olympic Cauldron, the Cruise Ship Terminal, Stanley Park, Chinatown, and Granville Island, where we got out. We loved it there, restaurants, a huge Granville Public Market, sunshine, seagulls, and good shopping. What's good shopping?  Stores that have things you won’t find anywhere else, and when someone says ‘where did you get that’ and you say ‘a tiny shop on a tiny island in Western Canada’ you know you won’t see them wearing it the next day. 

"Jetson's" skyline

We ate at Popina where a lobster roll went for $39. It had about as much meat as a claw on a Maine lobster and was padded with coleslaw. We sat on the Ferry Dock and looked at the skyline of skyscrapers in downtown Vancouver which Jane thought looked like Orbit City, the Jetson’s metropolis.

Cielito Lindo 

Accidentally walked into Muse Cannabis 

I didn't think we needed to go to the airport too early because it’s just Canada to California for goodness sake. But Jane wanted to go three hours early as is recommended for international flights. We needed every minute of it. US Customs has set up a pre-clearance system at Vancouver airport. Oddly you are welcomed to the US before getting on the plane. 

 

Bouncing back to Berkeley

San Francisco Embarcadero

Ippudo Berkeley with Nila

The Berkeley Beiser brothers, Peter and Franky, picked us up at the airport and drove us around for the next two days, anywhere and everywhere we wanted to go. The first night we went to dinner at Ippudo Berkeley, the ramen restaurant I had so loved in Japan. I got my beloved gyoza and spicy noodles, but they had anglicized the menu to include French fries and matcha cheesecake.  

Shattuck Plaza Hotel

We stayed at the Shattuck Plaza Hotel which was delightful, except for the sound of a gurgling ghost in the wall. Great location, only a 15-minute walk to Nila and Peter's place.

 

La Note, Berkeley

We had breakfast at La Note where they serve lattes in soup bowls. A woman at the next table told Jane she looked just like Tinkerbell, and that her daughter loved fairies, and they had recently seen Peter Pan. Jane insisted she did not look like Tinkerbell, but I told her any comparison to an adorable cartoon character is a compliment.

The real Twin Peaks

Jane had lived in San Francisco in the late 70's, early 80's and hadn't been there since, so she wanted to see how much it had changed. We started with the Ferry Building at the Embarcadero, which was definitely new since her time. Then we went to the highest point,Twin Peaks, a show I followed religiously that has nothing in common with this Twin Peaks. Next the Mission District, where we walked on Valencia Street, which we found fairly charming, and then up Mission Street which we didn’t, but we did stop for lunch at a good Mexican restaurant,Taqueria Cancun.

Murals in the Mission District

 

We requested that the next stop be Pacific Heights for the higher elevation, higher income level, and the higher priced shopping. We found all this and more. Peter found a way to kill time at Browser Books.  Jane found her favorite store, Suzane, whose Georgetown pop-up had recently closed. We drove by some of the Victorian/Edwardian houses called Painted Ladies, but these didn't have their makeup on.    

Yimm Oakland

 

We met Nila and Franky for dinner at a fun Thai restaurant called Yimm in Oakland which was yum, and then went for ice cream at Humphry Slocombe, known for its unusual flavors like Secret Breakfast which is bourbon ice cream with corn flake cookie blend-ins.  

We promised Jane a rose garden

Berkeley Rose Garden

It’s quite easy to entertain a florist in Berkeley. We took Jane to Berkeley Rose Garden, and then a walking tour of homes and gardens in the Berkeley Hills. 

Chez Panisse 

 

Jane took me to Chez Panisse for lunch, which was there when she lived in San Francisco, and Alice Waters was already the belle of the chef community. It lived up to its reputation.

Berkeley Hills Garden

I love Berkeley. Jane loved it too.  I’ve been so many times now that I know my way around, the weather is nice, the views are great, and you never know who you are going to meet.  Before we knew it we were talking to a scientist from Kitt Peak Observatory in Tucson whose job it is to map the universe. 

 

I asked him if there were signs of life out there and he assured me there are. So make sure your passport is up to date.

Berkeley Garden