Meat Montreal!

Photos by H. Darr Beiser

A meat market at Marche Atwater

Montreal just never got its hooks in my heart. Despite the many hooks hanging with sides of smoked beef. What’s up with all that meat? And poutine? And donuts? I guess their purpose is to warm you and make you forget that it is gray, gray, gray and cold, cold, cold in Montreal.

Jardin Botanique

Maybe it was because I went in October. Maybe it was because I had to work all week at the Palais des Congres de Montreal which puts film on its windows to give the appearance of color when you look outside. Good trick, Montreal. But it’s over the minute you step out.

Biosphere, Ile Sainte-Helene

We made the mandatory stop at Schwartz’s Deli. Joined the long line on Boulevard Saint Laurent. The menu features meat, large or small meat, plate or sandwich meat. Communal seating. I ordered the meat on a plate and a “perfect” stranger told me that I was doing it wrong and that the woman at my table who ordered the sandwich was doing it right. Suitably shamed, I ate the remainder of the meat on bread. It was good. It was not transcendent. Frankly I don't understand all the fuss.

Marche Atwater

To top it off, I went across the street to Ophelie Hats. Hats are a hopping business in Montreal, headgear is mandatory. There I found a perfect red and black cloche that clochely resembles a favorite hat I lost. A thoroughly modern milliner jumped in and told me that she would make one to order and I could pick it up in two days. Despite the personalized efforts it really doesn’t fit. A fit flop.

View from Mont-Royal

We are big baseball fans and found ourselves in Montreal during the League Championship Series. A quick review of our TV channels revealed that we would be deprived of this experience. In desperation we let our fingers do the stalking to find a sports bar. We found Piranha Bar. Oh dear. There was a fish tank with piranhas in it, but too dark, gloomy and murky to really see. Like the bar itself. But we received a shot of Canadian kindness from the bartender who queued up the games for us. We sat glued to the screen at a sticky table. We capped the evening with poutine at Frites Alors!

(We later discovered that our TV did broadcast the series and watched the other games in our hotel room. Zeut Alors! )

Parc du Mont-Royal

An interesting facet of the people of Montreal is their thorough and utter bilingualism. They glide like ice skaters between English and French. They make figure eight language swirls even when they don’t have to.  We sat next to a mother and daughter at dinner and they switched back and forth throughout the conversation. And for the most part the English is spoken without a French accent. I think they grew up with both English and French as first languages.  Thus when they speak English you would not know they speak French and vice versa.

  

Restaurant highlights: Tiradito representing the odd blend of Peruvian and Japanese cuisine, the plates are assembled in front of you. Delish. Have Octopus or Duck Anticucho. Beijing in Chinatown did everything right—fresh, ingredients, hot tea, hot food, fast service, all within the classic charmless atmosphere of a Chinese restaurant.  Thumb's down on Fiorellino. We got a mortadella pizza that was like a salami sandwich in pizza form. Nyk’s Bistro Pub is warm and yummy, if not a wee bit cozy with the tightly squeezed tables. If you want to drink extremely rich and extremely dark chocolate, and who doesn’t, go to Juliette & Chocolat.

One fine feature of the Montreal travel was the Canadian exchange rate. A $72 dinner came out to $56. A store owner, after discovering I was American, rung me up at $149 and said, “so this is like nothing for you!"

Beatlemania at the Insectarium

I made it to the Jardin Botanique Montreal, clearly it was the wrong time of year, but a beautiful expanse. Don't miss the Montreal Insectarium if you like creepy crawlers. I do. I also went shopping at Marche Bonsecours and found no style for miles. Montreal may be French but it is no Paris. 

Darr had the better experience in Montreal as the corporate spouse. He walked miles and as his photos attest there is lots of beauty there. But if you are going for a visit, make it a two-day trip, not five. 

This happened when we were there

On the other hand, based on recent news, take as long as you need.