Monday, April 10, 2017

Spokes are Spoken

Photos by H. Darr Beiser 


Bicycles rule

In Amsterdam we covered about 24 miles in three days and crossed every bridge when we came to it. There were many.

The city is entirely owned by bicyclists, they rule over pedestrians, and possibly over cars. Every type is on a bike here—mothers with children, commuters dressed smartly for work, students, friends, people who are so old they would be in assisted living by now in the states.

Hopping


Not here, they are fit and healthy and fast and they ride without a helmet and without a fear, smoking, texting, sometimes with no hands, and not a helmet in the city.

The Museum District


The Hotel Vondel was a delight. Very centrally located, small and modern and near everything. We were upgraded to a junior suite with a separate seating area and a big sofa.

Amsterdam is a city of good vibes for obvious reasons and not so obvious ones, and it’s hip and liberal, and fast paced and just interesting.  The only place where you will find somber and quiet is the Anne Frank House. Get tickets online up to two months in advance. Or stand in line as long as you need to after 3:30 p.m. (we waited two hours). You will be awe struck and silenced.

Line for the Anne Frank House


The royal palace of Amsterdam looks like it could use a major power wash. Plus, it was blighted with a cheap carnival on its grounds. I hope it was temporary. But the main blight was The View. This was a thing worse than the talk show with Whoopi and Elisabeth Hasselback.  This View is a hideous Ferris wheel with dubious little hanging cages.  




All cigarettes in the EU carry the scare tactic packaging—featuring the hideosities of cancer death in full color. The behavioral marketing doesn't seem to be working. People go right ahead and buy them and throw them down on a café table, making for a morbid montage tableau. Contrast this with the smoking/drinking participants at the table. They are laughing and are happy as hell.

Banksy



John and Yoko



Okay, so this little Netherlands country gave us spices from Indonesia and salt from Brazil, Van Gogh and Rembrandt, it gave us William the Orange and his organgeness as the national colour, and never forget, it bought Manhattan for us.
The Rijksmuseum


Van Gogh has his own magical museum, and Rembrandt pretty much owns Rijksmuseum.  And because the air is pretty much thick with culture, there was a 6-piece orchestra playing Vivaldi on the street when we left the museum.

Rembrandt


I’d heard that everyone in Amsterdam speaks English, but that’s not true; they speak Dutch, a language that features an overuse of vowels and much collision of consonants. What is true is that everyone in Amsterdam CAN speak English and they will flip to it the minute they get a whiff of the stars and stripes.

Sweeping generalizations, of course, but, these Dutch people are attractive, there are beautiful blondes, men with wavy hair cut short, sporting hipster glasses. Plus, they are tall, tall. And they wear fashionable coats and scarves, they have a very put together look.  Women wear boots and heels and bomb around the city with an air of confidence. There is not a shred of extra body fat in Amsterdam.

I found the hotel staff to be orderly and systematic. The hotel receptionist would not let us go until she had the answer to every question whether she had to look it up or not, and put other guests off until she was finished. I asked a hotel receptionist for help dialing a long distance number and he offered to write it down for me.  But not until he had grabbed a full sheet of paper, folded it in half, then in quarters, and carefully tore off one quarter for use.

Ducks rule


Had some rocking good fries in Amsterdam, try TEDS (all day brunch, don’t try to go for dinner) and Stach, where the chef personally made fries for my husband and came out to present them. Right up in the top ten. Food from Indonesia is also heavily featured here since the Dutch used to own it. We ate at Kartika,They call it spicy, but not by our standards. Great lunch at Café Hans en Grietje. Went “native” for dinner on the last night. The main dish is called stamppot, or as Dutch would have it “stamppotje," basically a big portion of mashed potatoes and accompaniment that change every week. So, at Joost, I had pumpkin flavoured mashed, and a side of delicious salmon. Avoid at all costs the Aran Irish Pub, I am blackballing it, food had to go back.



Canal Cruise
We took walks, we took a canal cruise, we took an Uber or two, but never used public transit. You can stride across this city with great ease. We saw neither windmills nor tulip fields, both require a little road trip.

Shop at Nine Streets to find hundreds of boutiques, most of them independent, yes they still exist.

So thumbs up for Amsterdam, you will walk in squares and circles over arches, you will have cobblestones under your feet, you will stop very often to express wonderment about what you are seeing, how it all came to be, and amazement that it is still here intact hundreds of years later for your enjoyment.

Tulips, but not too many



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